Not just another Nightmare
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Oh no which game could he be talking about? Nightmare on Elm Street perhaps? Bzzzt! WRONG! The worst game with Nightmares ever, this game IS my Nightmare well actually Bart’s Nightmare. This game makes me cringe. Just looking at the Cartridge makes me wanna throw the controller against the wall. In all my life I could never beat this game, why? Because it’s way too hard! Let’s take this game apart and see what I’m talking about.
The game starts off with Bart writing some essay in his room then falling asleep, everything turns gray suggesting that it’s the start of the Nightmare. The fan turns on and blows his papers out the window, Bart tries to go after the papers but falls into a black abyss, as you probably already gathered it’s your job to gather all those papers which sum up to a total of 8. And here we are walking around on the street looking for you papers. Jumping over crawling mailboxes, floating Jebediah Springfield head’s, walking Televisions, Basketballs and the such. But not his isn’t enough let’s add school busses, Old Ladies, Lisa who turns you into a frog, a Saxophone that makes you walk backwards, Principal Skinner and still more. Now when certain items hit you, you lose health which in this game is indicated by “Z”s. After you lose them all your vision becomes foggy and if you get hit once more you wake up thus ending the game.
You can retrieve Zs by blowing bubbles at them, which you can only do a certain number of times depending on how much gum you have and finding new gum isn’t easy or by riding your skateboard which you get if you jump over the basketball. Still I can live with all of this, what I can’t stand are some of the Mini-Games. See, each time you come across a piece of paper you have to jump onto it which will then transport you onto the page where you get to select between 2 doors. Each door has a certain color with each color being a certain Mini-Game. Green being Bartzilla where you run around Springfield destroying everything and fighting of Jets and Tanks. After getting zapped by a shrink ray you have to fight off Homer Kong and Momthra which is not easy at all.
The Violet Door makes you journey into a blood stream where you use and air pump to inflate germs until they explode then after a while you collect Smiling Joe Fission. 5 is the magic number that gets you that page.
Now the Yellow Door brings you to the Itchy and Scratchy World where you run around the house and fight off various household object and also Itchy and Scratchy. This mini-game is entertaining at first but just gets annoying as hell after a while.
The Blue door brings you to the world of Bartman where you must fly over Springfield and fight off Sherri and Terri, Barney Gumble, Waylong Smithers and of course Mr. Burns these characters are what you would consider bosses for this mini-game. Along with them you have to fend off rockets and avoid radioactive clouds.
The final door, Orange, brings you to the Indiana Bart world, where you jump from platform to platform in “The Temple of Maggie”.
They all sound pretty easy right? Well they aren’t. Here is a quick run through. I’ve never seen Homer Kong nor Momthra, never gotten the page in the Itchy Scratchy World, I’ve never gotten anywhere close to beating Mr. Burns and I always seem to jump on the wrong platform and die in the Temple of Maggie. This game makes me rage. It is impossible to enjoy yourself while playing this game because it’s just too damn tedious. I used to play this game at my cousins house all the time when I was a kid but never did I get anywhere close to all 8 pages and even now at the age of 22 I still suck. I’m playing it right and this moment and I can’t even get one page anymore. That’s how bad I’ve gotten. Least back in the day I was able to get one maybe 2.
This is the bottom line. Simpson games suck, the only decent ones where released back in the 2000 era like “Hit and Run” and whatever the last one was. But all the Simpson games on the NES, SNES, Genesis and Game Boy are just horrible. They are too frustrating to enjoy and just lack that certain control in difficulty. This game is a true pain in the neck for me. The only reason I’d get this game is to have all the SNES games in the world, seeing as that will never happen I don’t see it ever ending up in my hands again. Unless right now, thanks cousin Grrrrr.
That’s what I usually get
Anyway, as always Comments are welcomed and appreciated. Thanks for reading my review/ rant.
PS: I just read the best line ever. “Play the game reviewers are losing sleep over!” Hahaha, yeah i wonder why.
